Being a mom experience during a husband’s trip

I always want to know the future, but (surprise) I never do. Unfortunately, I’m not Marty McFly and I don’t have a super awesome DeLorean to take me forward into my future. When I enter into a new situation, my expectations are often turned upside down, causing bumps and bruises as I adjust to reality.

Now that I’ve been through a work trip with our daughter, I have a new perspective on it. Even though there were times I did, in fact, think I would go crazy… I was pleasantly surprised by many other experiences during the months apart from daddy.

My motherhood thoughts about the situation

1. It made it 1 billion times harder to say goodbye. It was the first time I ever saw my husband cry. Ever.
2. It made the time go by faster because I was so busy. I never knew that raising a child took so much time energy. Well, maybe I knew in my head, but until I experienced it, I didn’t really know. Time really seemed to fly at times during that business trip because I had much less free time to spend missing hubby.
3. Finding a time to talk became more difficult, as I was nursing or exhausted at times when he was available.
4. I was rarely ever bored. A new baby is a wonder. Watching her sleep, eat, coo, wiggle… it was all amazing. And, I spent a lot of time with his family as a result of her being in the world, so that helped with the boredom factor.
5. I grew close with other mom friends. There is definitely a deep understanding between moms, about parenting, and all the life changes brought on by a new child. I felt like I entered the “sisterhood.”
6. I took a million pictures. My camera roll had never contained more photos!
7. I saw a lot more of our family and relied on them more for support. I used to think, “I’d never go home for a long time during my husband’s work trip. I’m much too independent.” Well, that thinking changed. Immediately. And I spent a good month or two at my parent’s house through the time apart.
8. In some ways, I was less lonely. I had a buddy 24/7 to keep me company.
9. In a lot of ways, I missed hubby more. He was missing so much, and every new milestone brought a new reminder that he was gone.
10. I grew more independent in a new way. It’s amazing what you learn about yourself in the middle of the night, going on no sleep and dealing with a screaming kid. I found that at my wit’s end, I actually had more wits to work with than I had thought. =)
11. I had to work harder to attend activities. Being social definitely became more of a challenge and I had to be very intentional about it. Finding a babysitter, leaving early, not attending, and finding new outlets for activities all became part of life for me.
12. I asked for a lot more advice on Facebook and Google. Thank goodness for smartphones that can spew information on “how to get a baby to sleep?” or “what does green poo mean?” Lifesaver.
13. I spent time with the in-laws without hubby. Now that we had a child, there was much more reason to spend time with the in-laws. I really enjoy hubby’s family, but we hadn’t spent too much time together in our previous work trip. This time, we made plans to meet up more frequently.
14. The focus of the work trip shifted to include helping someone else through a work trip. “How can I keep her connected to Daddy?” and “How can I make sure she recognizes his voice and knows he loves her?” became new questions to answer.